Current mood:	okay
Current music:	Moshi Moshi-Brand New

Dream in Japanese, Dream in Japanese
In case you were wondering...I'm ok. I cry a lot. A LOT. Like at least once a day...Sunday was the worst but it's been getting better--I think. It's hard to say. How do you prepare yourself for your boyfriend to leave for 2 years? He goes to the Missionary Training Center on the 28th, 12 days. The Missionary Training Center is on my street. He lives just a few blocks from me. I've been talking about it more too which helps. It kinda feels like the inevitable, just hanging over my head. Like we're taking this from you...in a week and a half. Thank you. I almost wish it'd just happen. Also, I feel like I'm trying to push everything in to the time we have. We have to go out to these places to eat, and do these things and remember everything. It's almost a pressure to get it all in.

Thursday I woke up so tired and told myself I shouldn't hang out with Jordan that night because he'd probably be out late and I didn't want to stay out late. So I got in the shower and all of the sudden got all this anxiety! yuck I hate it. But I was feeling like I needed to hang out with him to get all the time in possible and that if I wasn't hanging out with him then I would be sorry after he left. So I felt like crap. I texted Jordan about it later and he said that maybe we shouldn't hang out then and nothing really got resolved. So after Chem Lab I went to do some Spanish Listening exercises and he texted me to call him. So I did and he was at my dorm =D yet!! I was so excited. He came and picked me up from Campus and we went and ate at the lovely Morris Center and had Waffles with Ice Cream and Syrup on top plus other stuff. After we finished eating we just sat and talked and it was nice. Then he had to leave but we were together for a while and that was "tender" as they say out here. At least we got done one of the things we wanted to before he leaves. While we were talking he bet me that I'd kiss Jeff. YUCK! No way. That'd grossE. I mean I like Jeff as a friend but I wouldn't kiss him. I can't wait to win that bet. I'm sure he'll say I really did kiss Jeff though cause he won't have any proof any way it goes down. But I will win!

School's been going ok. Today I finished up the last of my Chem HW and turned it in, did the Chem Lab and turned that in, finished the Spanish listening stuff and did pretty well in clogging. I even took notes in Chem (he gives us a print out of the power point slides so it's all there and you have to pay attention to take notes.

It's Sunshine's Birthday! yay! She's 19 today and her boyfriendish thing is coming down from BYU-Idaho...yes we have one of those. Plus a BYU-Hawaii. I would want to go there but the school isn't so hot and they don't offer the courses I need to graduate and it's expensive to fly out there and blah blah blah.

Adam's been talking to me weird lately. He must have picked up on me calling people "love" and he does it all the time now. Stuff he said to me last night just made me unsettled. =/ like he imed me and just said "love" and called me his love and asked what I was doing and I told him Chem but I could always talk to him and said that's why you're my love. He also called me his baby. Weird. He told me he loved me and I said you too and he said "too good to tell me you love me" so I told him. But I dunno it feels like his feelings are stronger than mine. I'm just thinking about Jordan ya know and he acts like me and him are together...I dunno it almost makes me uncomfortable. Oh well. Maybe he was drunk or high. It is a major possibility.

Called Jimmy (Jordan's friend from Florida who came to visit and is going on his mission in Feb) last night. We talked for a while. I like the guy. He has the most ridiculous laugh. It's great. I also talked to Ty and he wants to hang out. He's a cool kid, I'm scared about what is gonna happen to him though. Then Hellen called me earlier this week and Rachel came over last night. I felt all popular but in more of a superficial way (is there another way to feel popular?) But I dunno. I think Jimmy is a really genuine person and Ty's pretty cool but as much as I've hung out with Rach and Helen (we were gonna room together next year--we were that close ) I don't feel like I'll ever really know them. I like them a lot but they are superficial.

ha I just figured out my underwear are inside out. Jawesome.

Speaking of....Jordan gave me his pre-mission-you-can-keep-this-while-I’m-gone presents. I got his spoon bracelet (which I think he's letting me keep), his BYU Id card cause I love the picture, his TI 86 and his favorite boxers. yay. I was happy!

Ok well this entry is long enough. Don't worry about me, I'm happy and I will be ok. I promise...or you promise me or something like that